After months of preparation and fundraising, Dance Marathon at FSU finally reached the end of its weekend of dancing and gong smashing for $2.2 million, which, as a lotto jackpot would leave you wanting more, but it's definitely enough to save some sick children.
Read MoreBetween the gallons of prop hairspray, plus-sized hijinks and the sultry tones of Mark Ziegler as “The Voice of the News Broadcaster,” FSU’s School of Theatre was able to transport viewers back to 1962, a time when being black or fat was taken as a sign of inferiority, unlike how it totally still isn’t today.
Read MoreTime to rev up those voter cards and then put them away again because nobody is actually paying attention to this student-ran election
Read MoreIn a turn of events that nobody expected, the Unite Party and Legacy Party activated their polymerization Yu-Gi-Oh! card to fuse together into a singular entity that holds a strong passion for graphic design, unique color combinations and avoiding the use of the word "amplify" at all costs.
Read MoreStudying and caffeine in the library is key component for many FSU students survival. Without either, time stops and society crumbles like your sense of self worth after seeing a bad grade.
Read MoreThere’s nothing like finally getting into the groove of the semester and watching your immune system abruptly self-destruct because some gross normie decided their desk was going to be a tissue.
Read MoreIt's pretty obvious that FSU CollegeTown™ nightlife is waaayyy different and better and cooler than any other Collegetown™ nightlife… but did you know ours is also eternal?
Read MoreIt's the time of year where tensions are high exclusively for those who were safety patrols in the fifth grade and wanted to continue their involvement into college.
Read MoreFlorida State’s College of Motion Picture Arts is regarded by many as no-fucking-joke, especially to the Digital Media Production majors who were rejected because they didn't already have three student Emmys under their belts.
Read MoreNoting that Books™ preach a correlation between a change in interior design with adulthood success once former children leave for university, moms everywhere are tickled pink at the sight of a fresh coat of beige paint, white bedding and lukewarm family memories strewn lovingly across the walls.
Read MoreIn the spirit of giving this holiday season, I’ve decided to give everyone the greatest gift of all: the pleasure of hearing me complain.
Read MoreIt’s almost time for winter break, so get ready for that inevitable three weeks of doing nothing but watching reruns of Law and Order: SVU, Everybody Hates Chris and holiday movies that serve no other purpose than to exist as white noise.
Read MoreIf, over the last two years, you've read an Eggplant FSU article that centered on cats or weed or cats and weed, it’s likely that I pitched the headline. That’s because if there’s anything I’ve learned at my time here at FSU, it’s that cats and weed are fucking hilarious. A photoshopped picture of a cat smoking weed? Peak comedy, baby!
Read MoreWith finals week in full swing, many students at FSU are scrambling to activate their three remaining brain cells to condense the knowledge of a whole semester into a few hours overnight in Strozier.
Read MoreChris, or Kyle, is it? These last sixteen weeks have been nothing short of magical.
Read MoreFrom the series of torrential downpours plaguing Tallahassee this past weekend, it's pretty obvious that God is starting a second flood to punish the Chads and Brads of the Interfraternity Council for once again dishonoring the school but somehow still making their alumni proud.
Read MoreThese skills will also help you with finals!
Read MoreThe weather outside is truly frightful, which means it’s that time of year when every 5-foot-7 guy on campus with an overly muscular neck and decked out muffler shows off his cojones-of-steel to the rest of us coddled pansies.
Read MoreDespite students’ complaints of drowning in several thousands of dollars of loans, it’s that time of year again where everyone is barraged with messages to donate toward a philanthropy without literally any explanation other than that "it's for a good cause."
Read MoreOver the past 48 hours, FSU's student body has experienced all five stages of grief over the end of our 2,191-day streak of never having lost to UF in the beautiful game of football.
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