Posts in Featured
Last Chance! Campus Chili’s Glory Hole Closing for Semester This Friday

As finals week rapidly approaches, students are taking advantage of the several stress-relieving amenities Florida State has to offer. Many will be sunbathing on Landis, some will be heading over to the Leach and others will be making their way over to Chili’s for casual dining featuring subpar Tex-Mex cuisine and a prominently located glory hole.

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This Guy Fucks: Student Never Asks Starbucks Employee for Room for Cream in His Coffee

Whoa, watch out for Josh! Florida State sophomore Joshua Rooney visits the Dirac Starbucks every morning, but unlike the other lonely virgins that congregate at this caffeine source before their 9:30 classes, he’s confident enough to shake his head back and forth when the barista asks if he wants room in his coffee for cream. Wow, this guy fucks!

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Thrasher Passes Bill Allowing University to Discriminate Based on if You’re a Fuckin’ Nerd!!!

Following Mississippi Governor Phil Bryant (R) signing a bill into law legalizing discrimination against the LBGTQ+ community, FSU President John Thrasher has jumped on the bandwagon of bigotry and signed his own bill into law, effective immediately: Florida State University employees may now discriminate based on whether they think you’re a fuckin’ nerd.

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