A cold front has taken over in the past 24 hours, with temperatures sinking lower than the average friend group's combined GPA's. Students across campus have kicked off their flip flops for a pair of tall brown leather boots, and have taken to using their morning Starbucks as a sad Floridian alternative to owning a pair of gloves. But nothing has been more overdone this cold front than the usage of the Snapchat temperature filter, which, as of this morning has been so overused that the feature is down until less Snap-able weather conditions return. “When we first included that filter in the app, we had no idea how much people experiencing cold weather for the first time of the season would seek attention for it,” remarked Snapchat CEO Evan Spiegal as he snapped a dick pic and sent it to 10 random users in Snapchat’s database, a feature currently only accessible by Spiegal and US Congressmen. “I mean obviously Snapchat is one big cry for universal attention, but come on, get more creative with it.” Snapchat has been gaining a lot of press in the past few days after announcing a new feature where users can send each other money. “I mean how DOPE is that?!” Inquired Spiegal. “Get over the fuckin’ temperature thing.”
Not everybody is so positive about the temperature feature’s hiatus. Dance major Amelia Frances is worried that this will seriously affect her ability to rub Tallahassee’s cold weather in the faces of her South Florida friends. “I mean yeah, I guess we beat Miami on Saturday but that’s just not enough anymore.” Said Amelia while purchasing her third North Face Jacket with her dad’s credit card. “Daddy just wants me to be warm this winter."
Despite the few objections, Snapchat is sticking to its original plan to hold off on the temperature feature until this cold front becomes old news. In the mean time, if students feel they must know the temperature, there’s always the good old-fashioned iPhone weather app, and you don’t even have to take a selfie to access it.