University Ambassadors and Orientation Leaders Duke it Out Over Who Has More Fun Facts About FSU
Some of the nation’s greatest rivalries are attributed to institutions like Army versus Navy or Michigan versus Ohio State, but both pale in comparison to the rivalry at what is the considered to be the oldest continuous site of higher education in the state of Florida: FSU’s University Ambassadors and Orientation Leaders. Each has an extensive training process that ranges from memorizing scripts about the best places to cry on campus to rapid-fire Jeopardy! rounds of campus trivia to prepare for the eighty-sixth time they get asked, “So what does HCB stand for?” Whether they’re sporting their iconic stripes or sleek black polos designed for peak aerodynamics when running to catch the bus, these individuals are dripping with school spirit (and sweat) while endlessly trying to out-nerd one another as they work towards being named the most trivia-horny student employees at Florida State.
“G-O-O-D M-O-R-N-I-N-G, good morning, good morning! Did you know that Doak Campbell Stadium is the longest, continuous brick structure in the United States? It took me nine days to learn that,” chanted Nick Dempsey, a Junior University Ambassador known among his peers for literally busting a nut at the sight of Westcott Fountain, while backflipping onto the top of The Flying High Circus (one of only two collegiate circuses in the United States). “These dry-fit polos harness from the sun and allow us to operate at peak fun- fact-functionality. Also, our polo shirts make it easier for us to blend in since we aren't painted the color of a sunfaded McDonald's."
“Did you know that during FSU’s Raise the Torch Campaign we raised over a billion dollars? That’s like a hundred billion pennies if you really think about it!” said Sophomore Orientation Leader Julie Wren while forcibly ushering guests out of the Bookstore to ensure they made it to their "Eat Sushi Off of President Thrasher" block with time to spare. “In this brief tour, you’ll see all facets of the university without having to stand in the sun for two-and-a-half hours like some other people would like for you to endure. You’re gonna get an inside look at every exciting part of campus during our orientation as we traverse from the iconic Unconquered Statue to the lesser known gems such as the two bathrooms on campus with minimal gaps between the stalls. They’re not as popular with student groups like the ‘Self-identified Peeping Toms,’ but everyone else seems to really appreciate them.”
Although University Ambassadors and Orientation Leaders clearly have a bit of a rivalry when it comes to sharing facts absolutely no one cares about, at the end of the day they both demonstrate valuable support for incoming students and their families. It seems that both of these groups have more in common than they think, especially in the ways they decide to sport their required khaki shorts. Cuffs it is!