Florida State University announced yesterday that the university’s annual black history month celebration will conclude with a celebrity boxing match between university president Eric Barron and former neighborhood watchman George Zimmerman. This will be President Barron’s first time in the ring since his convincing victory last year over Casey Anthony as part of FSU’s Mother’s Day festivities.
In preparation for the fight, President Barron has undergone intense training under the tutelage of FSU quarterback Jameis Winston who advises Barron to not only do it, but to do it big. The fight will take place on February 28 inside Doak Campbell Stadium, students who attend will receive ten Loyalty Points.
“My goal is to make this university a more accepting and unified place” says President Barron, “and if fighting George Zimmerman will do that then that is what I have to do. I also needed something to get everyone to like me again after I banned smoking. Right now the only people on my side are the god damn college republicans. I have to change that.”