Due to Popular Demand, FSU is Putting a Second Argo Tea Location on Campus

Everyone’s favorite Seminole Dining option, Argo Tea, is officially getting a second location on FSU’s campus. The administration finally listened to the student body’s constant demands for better food and drink options in the heavily frequented Claude Pepper Center, where the new Argo Tea is set to be located. 

The Landis Green Argo Tea has been gaining wild popularity over the years, and students have been forced to wait in line for hours to use their dining dollars on a kombucha. New and trendy phrases have been circulating around campus, including but not limited to: “If you’re not at Argo Tea, where are you even?” and “Moji Tea Squeeze makes the world go round.” Hundreds of student groups had even begun peacefully protesting on campus for the right to a second Argo Tea location. FSU students are notorious for having their priorities straight. 

Following the announcement of the new Argo Tea, students rejoiced, for their prayers had finally been answered. One student stated, “This blessing humbles me. History was made today, and our campus can finally be at peace.” The grand opening of the new location is rumored to attract over 20,000 people, including many from the greater Tallahassee area. President Richard D. McCullough was even chosen to cut the ceremonial ribbon with a comically huge pair of scissors. The Eggplant will be covering the unveiling of the Claude Pepper Center Argo Tea, so tune back in for more tea later this week.